Let me preface by saying not all cats that have only one eye are bad. This particular cat, Ngang-Ngang, is a particular terror. Not only is his name Ngang-Ngang, which should have been an immediate red flag because I still struggle making the “ng” sound in the local language, but also his meows are just plain sinister sounding.
Ngang-Ngang bit my ankle a week ago, which prompted me to travel six hours for post-exposure rabies shots. I’m not a big traveller, especially when the destination is a doctor’s office. But my mood to travel was saved when my Indonesian co-teachers offered to drive. We bonded over Starbucks, sang cheesy Indonesian love songs in the car, laughed at my sad attempts at the local language, and even found time to lesson plan for the first few English classes we’d teach together. It was amazing, and as much as I hate to admit, that one-eyed cat might’ve helped solidify healthy working and personal relationships for the next two years.
2. Actions aren’t always consistent with each other
One of my neighbors bought me a traditional-style blouse (batik). It had a beautiful red pattern, and I was excited to try it on and show my ibu (host mother). But alas, it was too small. I showed my ibu that it was too small, and all she did was laugh, point at my body, and say “too fat.” I was already used to the cultural practice of expressing opinions about physical appearance, so I wasn’t offended. I just nodded, took off the batik, and gave it to my ibu.
Ten minutes later, my ibu knocks at my door with a huge plate of rice and says I need to eat more so I won’t get sick. This is one aspect of Indonesian culture I have trouble understanding. If she called me fat, shouldn’t she want me to eat less? This particular mystery will take a while to figure out. In the meantime, I will accept that actions aren’t always consistent with each other. And I will also try to accept that rice is the medicine for all ailments.
3. Do not be too emotional
One of the teachers at my school asked me to offer commentary during a volleyball tournament. I have zero experience commentating sports events. Plus, our three months of Bahasa Indonesia (BI) lessons surprisingly offered no sports vocabulary. I declined and instead sat next to him. He spoke quickly in BI, so I could only catch certain words. A few minutes in, he took a break from the game and asked me a question in English to the crowd of students. Not many of the students could understand English, so the commentator graciously translated my response into the microphone. Instead of translating my response correctly, he decided to make a joke and told everyone in the local language that I thought he was so handsome.
I know my language skills are still lacking, and I’ve gotten used to people laughing at my poor attempts. But this time people were laughing not because of my mistake but because of a joke about me. In hindsight, I shouldn’t have been so emotional. I should have played it off by grabbing the microphone and playfully and charmingly correcting him. Instead, I walked away and probably reinforced the stereotype that Americans are too sensitive.
4. Know thy neighbors
When I lived in America, the Internet was always there if I became bored. Things are a bit different living in the village. I currently only get Internet at school, so a lot of my free time at home is spent wondering what to do. I wander the neighborhood. I talk to the neighbors. I let the kids follow me and sing songs. I take the time to smell the flowers, an act I seldom did in America.
That’s the habit I will definitely bring back home with me. Things could be progressively better if people just took the time to talk with their neighbors. My social anxiety is still there, and I’m haunted by it every time I meet a new person. But at the end of my walk, I feel more re-energized than any online cute cat video could make me.
5. Indonesians are the most helpful people I’ve met
My co-worker took me to the nearest mall. She parked in the parking garage across the street. Pedestrians in Indonesia do not receive the same rights as they do in America. Pedestrians here do not get the right of way. We kind of have to weave through the traffic. There’re not really any traffic lights for pedestrians either. It was sort of traumatizing the first time I crossed the street by myself, but I’m kind of a pro at it now.
Anyway, my co-worker didn’t know I was well versed in the dangers of menyeberang (crossing the street), so she caringly grabbed my hand as she weaved through traffic. At first I thought she was babying me and I was a bit offended. But then I realized I haven’t been babied in a long time. It felt sort of nice. So I let her hold my hand even after we were well away from danger. I let her hold my hand as we rode the escalator inside the mall. Hell, it felt nice. Why not?! Although I realize now that my liking to hold hands crossing the street kind of takes away from my independent American street cred at work. Meh. It’s a small price to pay for such comfort.
6. The guy doing the adan this morning sounded like Alan Rickman
Islam is the reigning religion in Indonesia. There are mosques everywhere. In America, there are Starbucks on every corner. In Indonesia, there are mosques. As a result, there is a call to prayer on a loudspeaker five times a day. I’ve gotten so used to it that I no longer awaken to the 4:30am call to prayer. But this particular morning, the adan (morning call to prayer) sounded like Alan Rickman reciting verses. I attribute that to my not having watched anything in English for a few months and my neglect to bring any movies spoken in English. I also attribute that to the hallucinatory side effects of my malaria medication. And I got to say, if I’m going to hallucinate anything, Alan Rickman’s voice is not a bad choice.
